Pie Craft

[Mr. K]

I buy a DS instead, and use the money I saved to get pie.

Lemmings emoticons

[Ice_Eagle]

I enlarged  ,  :angry:,  :mikeundecided:, :mikeangry:, , and in Photoshop and printed them out. Then I use them to scare people on Halloween during Trick or Treat so that they'll give me a pie.

A glowing jellyfish

[Mr. K]

I electrocute the pie seller and steal his pies.

a random computer wallpaper changer

[Ice_Eagle]

I use this wallpaper changer to list all the wallpapers that it'll change into. When the wallpaper changer switched a wallpaper into a pie, I smashed the monitor and saw a pie inside.

A mermaid

[Lemming]

I threaten to kill the mermaid unless she gives me pie. She is smart, and complies.

An N-Gage.

[Ice_Eagle]

I bought a game called "Pie Panic" for my N-Gage. I started playing it. After I had beaten a few levels a "Free Pie" phone number displayed. I dial that number,then, 5 minutes later, a pie is delivered to me!

A bowl

[Canadian Chimp]

Being a new user, by simply holding out a bowl, people will begin throwing pies at me. Using this process, as well as a sign saying "NEW USER" next to a dummy of myself, People will be distracted by my dummy (I.e: Throwing pies at it) so when I sneak up behind them, and throw the bowl at one of them, the pies will become mine. If you throw a bowl at one pie thrower, the rest run away.

An elaborate sword that will break upon contact with anything but human skin.

[Lemming]

*it breaks, revealing a pie you didn't know was inside*

Two N-Gages

[Liebatron]

I have no clue what an N-gage is so I can't use it, therefore, I am forced to make a pie from scratch. First, I get a job at DQ, then I use the money to slowly save up enough to buy a pie.

So many N-gages that the next poster is literally drowning in them and can't get out of the pile.

[Isu]

I fetch a box of matches from my inner clothing, and set the entire dump alight.
I somehow manage to avoid burning to a crisp, and after the flames die down, I pop down the local shop for a nice pork pie. Just what I needed after having a near-death experience.

Shredder

[Liebatron]

Do you mean a shredder as in a paper shredder? if so, then I sell it to some guy who doesn't have one after sending him information such as banking numbers, secrets to get inside his house, and other such things so that he buys it from me at a ridiculously high price. Then I take the money and buy a calculator. Having this, I get a job at a nuclear power plant doing calculations and making it so there isn't a meltdown.  The job interview goes like this:

Boss: So, do you have any job expierience in nuclear power plants at all?
Me: No.
Boss: What reason is there for me to employ you here? your resume has no previous expierience in any job and no college degree on it... I don't even see a high school degree... You never finished first grade? because that isn't on here either... Your resume is a blank sheet of paper! have you been sitting at home sleeping all your life or what?
Me: No.
Boss: is that all you can say?
Me: No.
Boss: then answer my questions!
Me: My Resume is blank because I didn't feel like filling it out or writing anything, but it is true that I have never worked in a nuclear power plant before.
Boss: Then why should I employ you?
Me: because I can stop the react from-
Boss: it's called a reactor, not a react, go on.
Me: right, I knew that! anyway, I can do calculations.
Boss: What's 556649563876 divided by 36891346084602658902357645?
I start to take out my calculator-
Boss: Oh! I had no idea you had one of those! I'll find some position for you, an important, high pay job if any are open.
Me: I want one of those high paying joobs you just spoke of, can I have one of those?
Boss: certainly, even if I have to fire someone to get you in there.

-Later-

Boss: this is Ted, the person you'll be replacing.
Ted: What?!?!?! you're replacing me!?!??!? I have a P.H.D in nuclear physics, a masters degree in math and algebra, and a bachelors degree in science!!! What's he got? nothing! no job qualifications!
Me: I have a calculator.
Ted: Ohhhhhhhhh...Sorry, I resign from my position for the good iof this power plant. Watch your step getting into your chair, I spilled coffee there last week and the area's still slippery.
Ted walked out of the building to find another job.

So anyways, I got my salary, and went out and bought a pie.

A mint

[BLAZE]

A nothing? Hm, I alchemically turn the nothing into a pie.

KSoft's left shoe.

[Chmera]

I steal the shoe, and hold it hostage. A pie, or I torch it. He gives me the ransom, and he gets his shoe back. Everyone wins.

A corpse

[Liebatron]

I turn the corpse in to the police, who give me about 2 euros in return for doing so. I then yell, " What, is that it?!?! I only get 2 euros for finding a corpse for you guys!?!? cough up you cheapskates!" They then give me about 5 more euros. I walk to Aldi's and get a pie.

-By the way, is it true that there are a bunch of Aldi's (a nifty grocery store) in Germany? And that Aldi means stuff in German?

-The item is a old car with no gasoline in it in the middle of the Sahara desert, nowhere near any civilization. You also have just been moved by a giant pair of tweezers(for those of you who play rollercoaster tycoon) to the opposit end of the world, which would be...Processing...The middle of the Pacific ocean.

-Also Blaze, if you are referring to the alchemy in that show, full metal alchemist, then technically, that wouldn't work. You're forgetting or disregarding the law of equivalent exchange... I wish I could do that! making something from nothing would be awesome! teach me how

[TOG]

Well, since the old car is on the other side of the world, I can't really use it, even if it did work. So instead I just dog paddle nowhere in particular until I drown. My corpse is carried by underwater currents to the west of Scandinavia, where Aegir, the god of the sea, takes my soul down into the deep sea caves which he dwells in. After about a day, he gets tired of my annoying face, and the fact that I complain that there are no pies, other than the octopi pie, but I didn't like the sound of that one... so anyway he picked me up and threw me through the ceiling, and about 2,000 miles south.

...time passed and I decided maybe I could have settled for an octopi pie...

Since I was going so fast when I hit the ground, I merely broke through about seventeen layers of igneous rock, because for some unexplained and not needed to be explained reason, I was in my body again... but that really didn't matter, because Hades ripped my soul out of me. I was really upset with this sort of crossing over stage, so I began whining at Hades. He was used to this sort of thing, because I noticed that all the spirits down there were whining too, but he felt like punishing someone, so he sent me to go push a rock up a hill. I would have complained, but just then Hades got up and booted me across the cavern. While he was laughing, I bounced off the walls for quite some time...

...When I finally stopped bouncing and he finally stopped laughing, I was standing next to some old guy who was pushing a rock up a hill for the three fourteen millionth eight hundred fifty one thousandth four hundred sixty fifth time. I began pushing my rock up the hill, and quickly I caught up with the guy.
   I said to him, "This doesn't seem to hard; we're already half done."
   He then rested one of his hand against the rock, and with the other he pulled out five cards. It was a card trick, and I didn't like being tricked, so I ran up and tripped the guy. The old man and both rocks rolled down the slope, and he was crushed against the wall, but he merely stuck his hand out to say he was okay. I would have hurt him further, but just then Hades popped up behind me, and I began running...

...After running through a bunch of tunnels, I came to a three headed dog. I tried to juke so that I might fake the dog out, but it only tricked his left head, the middle one barked, and the right one bit my head off... but as you technically can't die in the underworld, I was just punished further. Apparently I was only supposed to push the rock up once so I could learn a lesson, but Hades wasn't even amused anymore, instead he threw an old copper shovel at my head, and told me to dig until the hole was deeper than the bottomless pit. I dug for what seemed an enternity, and I got fed up with this, so I climbed up the side of the wall, and just when I began to see some errie blue lighting like there always was in the underworld, my right hand fell off, and then I fell...

...Eventually I landed next to my right hand, and then I popped it back on, and climbed again, this time all the way to the top. But when I had finally arrived, it turned out time had ended. And the only person there was someone wearing what I always imagined Dr. Watson would wear, except this guy was a lot older. But what interested me a lot more than all of that was the fact the he was holding a blueberry pie in his hands, my fifth most favorite pie, just below pi, the greek symbol. Well, heck, I was hungry; I hadn't eaten in one time (literally). So I grabbed the pie and began eating it. Then I realized the old man had tricked me, and that looked kind of like the guy who had been pushing the rock up the hill.

It wasn't blueberry pie. It was crowbar pie! I was about the yell at the guy, but he kicked me through a door marked "paradox (kind of)". And next thing I knew I was sitting in a old car with no gasoline in it in the middle of the Sahara desert, nowhere near any civilization. Then all of a sudden these big pair tweezers came down and picked me up... That what you call a paradox (kind of)! But at least I had eaten a pie, even if it was crowbar pie, my seventh most favorite, just under octopi pie.

A copy of the game "Play Ball!". All it does is show stats from 1992 and earlier for the MLB.