Random Story

[Ice_Eagle91]

said Xan's guard, who was very dumb. "NO, DUMMY!" said Xan. Then he twisted the guard and squeezed his lemon juice out, because Xan's guard is a big ugly lemon.

[Liebatron]

"yup.how'd you know that?"

[Ice_Eagle91]

said Lemmy. "That lemon...he's dumb!" said Xan. "His name is Mr. Lemon." "What a dumb name!" said Lemmy.

[Liebatron]

"yes i know. i made him a lemon."

lemmy was suddenly very confused.

[Ice_Eagle91]

The two of them went inside and had dinner.

[Mr. K]

While they were eating a plane flew through the roof. Inside the plane were two people Lemmy hadn't seen for years...

[Lemika]

Sonic the Hedgehog and Starfox. Lemmy was horrified. "You! I thought I killed you years ago!"
"You did," Xan said, casually pouring coffee into the same hatch he'd used before. "I brought 'em back to plague you."
"The world has it in for me," Lemmy moaned. "All wish to kill me!"
"Quite right," Sonic and Starfox chorused.
"Oh, did I mention? I also made them into mindless killing machines."
"Noooo!" Lemmy shouted, and dived...

[Lemeri]

out the window. But Xan's Coffee Missle caught him in the back before he had gone far, and stretched him out on the ground.

[Lemika]

"My poor young friend," Xan lamented, casually chucking Lemmy's body out the window. "Death to the disbeliever!" Lemmy shrilled on his way out.
"You're not dead after all, are you? Well, I shall fix that," Xan proclaimed, and shot Lemmy through the heart with a shock rifle.
Lemmy fell very far into an icy blue ocean. When he resurfaced, the world seemed to have changed. "How long have I been here?" he wondered.
Then he heard a metallic scraping behind him, and ...

[Lemeri]

A little green Lemming came up to the surface.
"Me water Lemming. Me not Krall" it stated.
"Err..." Lemmy snarled, for he had a feeling that this had happened before "Me Krall. Me not Lemming"
"No, You Lemming. Me Krall." the Lemming stated.
"You Lemming. Me Krall" Lemmy said through gnashing teeth.

[Lemika]

"You right. You Krall. You die." the odd Lemming twirled a tridant around in flambouyant style, and was about to slice Lemmy's head off, when he suddenly darted forwards and jumped into the water.
"Whaaa? You stupid. You drown. Me kill you."
"No!" Lemmy screamed. "I am the Grand Intellect! You will not destroy me! You will not destroy LIFE!" he grabbed the tridant, twisted it, and plunged it into the heart of the Lemming.

[Lemeri]

"...buh?"

[Lemika]

Lemmy stared in horrified fascination as the Lemming melted into the ground, making odd 'buh' noises as it went.
"Such power exists! And I, yes, I control it!" he exulted, and pounded the tridant into the ground, a vicious grin spreading itself across his face.
"No, you don't, kid..."

[Mr. K]

said a towering figure. Dr. Robotnik, in his Eggmobile, was tossing a Gamecube. "I do." The Gamecube emitted a strange noise, and video game characters spilled out. He assembled all the heroes and enemies into a group and yelled, "KILL THAT LEMMING!" Lemmy, at the last minute, blew a whistle, and a bunch of lemmings swooped down from nowhere-- the Save our Lemmings Squad. They were ready to help Lemmy in a huge battle. All the characters dived at Lemmy, and the battle began.

[Ice_Eagle91]

Except for one person - Xan. Xan was the spectator, and he wanted Lemmy to win the battle.