Post some jokes here!

[Nessy]

Corny jokes posted in another Discord server I'm a part of. Enjoy!

- Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me, it means a lot.

- Past, present, and future walked into a bar, it was tense.

- Luke, Leia, Han, and Chewbacca walk into a bar. Yoda walked under it.

- Son: Daddy, I'm cold. Dad: Go in the corner. It's always 90 degrees over there.

- I got so bored watching the earth rotate, so after 24 hours I called it a day.

[WillLem]

Which word is spelled incorrectly in every dictionary?

Spoiler

Incorrectly

What cheese do you use to encourage a bear to come with you?

Spoiler

Camembert

Why did I name my horse "Treacle"?

Spoiler

Because she had golden styrrups

I was up all night trying to work out where the sun was; then it dawned on me.

I tried playing football, but I wasn't any good. I just stood there trying to work out why the ball was getting bigger; then it hit me.

Someone once said "it's not rocket science!" to me when I was asking about something I didn't understand. To be fair, I was asking about how it would be possible to allow an object to defy gravity long enough to propel something extremely heavy away from the Earth, so they may have been wrong.

I was in a public restroom and there was some graffiti on the wall that said "Jesus saves...but Ronaldo scores on the rebound!"

And, an old favourite of mine... What did the robot say to the petrol pump?

Spoiler

Take your finger out of your ear when I'm talking to you!

[WillLem]

There are two types of people in the world: those who can extrapolate,

[607]

I just came across a joke in a textbook on Psycholinguistics that I'm not sure I'd read before!

The quack was selling a potion which he claimed would make men live to a great age. He claimed he himself was hale and hearty and over 300 years old. "Is he really as old as that?" asked a listener of the youthful assistant. "I can't say," said the assistant, "I've only worked with him 100 years."